Starring: Doesn't Matter Director: Person who should be ashamed of themselves
Much like the Blair Witch Project this was a great marketing job to make people think was in any way true or in any way scary. I am trying to come up with a word that can describe this movie; bad, stupid, poorly acted, contrived? All work but none do it justice. I am going to film the sequel, me sitting on my couch listening to my house settle and occasionally getting startled when one of the sounds is a little louder then the other.
This movie should have been one scene long, they hear a loud noise and leave the house. The boyfriend is supposed to be a dayt trader who works out of the house. If the demaon really didn't like him why didn't he attack him while he was working at home or give him some bad stock tips. "Boo , Buy 20,000 shares on margin, Boo" Atleast it would have made it funny. Instead they hear weird noises every night, sleep with the door open, and never leave. If this was reality all participants deserve what happened to them and I deserve my money back.
Stick with the classics - the original Halloween, the original Friday the 13th, the original Texas Chainsaw. If you want ghosts, check out the Peanuts Halloween Special - Chuck Brown was a very spooky ghost.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Extract
Starring: Jason Bateman, Kristen Wiig, Mila Kunis and Ben Affleck. Directed by Mike Judge
Extract is the story of a man, Jason Bateman, trapped in a sexless marriage and an owner of a business he longs to sell so he can escape the routine his life has become.
If you want to see a Mike Judge movie that is well cast, well written and funny watch Office Space and avoid Extract. Extract is a bunch of scenes that are thrown together with a plot that never goes anywhere. Bateman's character Joel avoids conflict in every scene and allows every person he comes into contact with to dictate his responses. I found his character hard to root for and deserved every bad thing that happened to him throughout the movie. Even in the end he didn't resolve any of the problems that plagued him in the beginning. He just seem to resolved to continue going through the motions. I kept hoping he would go through the metamorphasis Ron Livingston's character Peter went through in Office Space and take charge of his life. Instead he just made bad decisions that backfire and in turn no fun ensues.
Kristen Wiig and Mila Kunis are good characters in other movies, but in Extract they are poorly used and their characters only hurt Joel and make him look more pathetic. My least favorite character is Ben Affleck's Dean, Joel's bartender/sage that helps him get into multiple unfortunate situations. Dean is a poor imitation of Diedrich Bader's character Lawrence in Office Space. Lawrence was funny and whose advice helped ground Peter. I did not find Dean entertaining and found Affelck's performance uninspired. There were certain scenes in the bar where Dean and Joel were talking and the lines he was saying were funny but his performance was so without feeling they just fell flat.
If I hadn't seen Land of the Lost I would say that Extract is the worst comedy of 2009.
Extract is the story of a man, Jason Bateman, trapped in a sexless marriage and an owner of a business he longs to sell so he can escape the routine his life has become.
If you want to see a Mike Judge movie that is well cast, well written and funny watch Office Space and avoid Extract. Extract is a bunch of scenes that are thrown together with a plot that never goes anywhere. Bateman's character Joel avoids conflict in every scene and allows every person he comes into contact with to dictate his responses. I found his character hard to root for and deserved every bad thing that happened to him throughout the movie. Even in the end he didn't resolve any of the problems that plagued him in the beginning. He just seem to resolved to continue going through the motions. I kept hoping he would go through the metamorphasis Ron Livingston's character Peter went through in Office Space and take charge of his life. Instead he just made bad decisions that backfire and in turn no fun ensues.
Kristen Wiig and Mila Kunis are good characters in other movies, but in Extract they are poorly used and their characters only hurt Joel and make him look more pathetic. My least favorite character is Ben Affleck's Dean, Joel's bartender/sage that helps him get into multiple unfortunate situations. Dean is a poor imitation of Diedrich Bader's character Lawrence in Office Space. Lawrence was funny and whose advice helped ground Peter. I did not find Dean entertaining and found Affelck's performance uninspired. There were certain scenes in the bar where Dean and Joel were talking and the lines he was saying were funny but his performance was so without feeling they just fell flat.
If I hadn't seen Land of the Lost I would say that Extract is the worst comedy of 2009.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
The Blind Side
Starring Sandra Bullock, Tim McGraw directed by John Lee Hancock and based on a book by Mchael Lewis
The start of this movie did not go well for me. We got to the theater late and I had to get refreshments while my wife got our seats. I bought a coke, a water and two lage popcorns and wedged them into one of those carrying trays. Suzanne, my wife's name, had gotten seats in the middle of a crowded row. My popcorn was already ready to fall out of the tray so I knew negotiating the row was going to be a daunting task. I started out OK but three women right next to my seat wouldn't stand up and let me pass, they just kind of moved there feet a little. Now to give you some idea of the logistics I am 6'1" 240 lbs and by no means nimble. Well I stepped on the first two women's feet, and I kind of tried to bunny hop the third woman and almost fell forward and dumped the drinks and the popcorn on Suzanne. Luckily I didn't. Sweating and shaken I sat down for the feature.
Another thing you should know, I really didn't want to see the movie, I wanted to see Sherlock Holmes. I usually keep the feel good based on true events movies for home viewing. That way I can comment out loud at the parts I think are made up Hollywood nonsense. But since I get to pick most of the movies we see, I'm a dick sorry, and this had football in it, so we went.
This was a very watchable movie. It told the story of Michael Oher, a man child left on his own by a mother who wasn't able to take care of herself and adopted by a headstrong woman and her family in Memphis, TN. It showed the manchild blossom from an introverted and damaged young man into a student, an athlete and a family member. It was hearfelt without being preachy.
This was Sandra Bullock's best acting job to date, except for the movie where she plays a drug addict that gets sent to rehab. I dont know the name of the movie and I cant find it on her biography, conspiracy? There are no snorts or cutesy moments for her in the movie, she stays with the character the whole movie and does a good job. One thing I would like to see is if she really went to a crack den and threatened to shoot a dealer. Doesn't seem realistic, in my mind that event would end allot different then a crack dealer getting put into his place by a small white woman, but who knows.
The best actor in the movie was the son SJ played by Jae Head, which would be a great name for a rasta band. The kid was great and added heart and made a real connection between Big Mike and the Tuohy family.
There are several parts of the movie that I would love to know if they really happened or were they made up to make the movie more realtable. First is the crack den scene I mentioned before, the second is did the mother ever go and show the coach how to inspire Michael Oher to be more aggressive. I think in real life that would be demeaning to both the caoch and the player, and if my Mom came of the field and helped coach me I would get shit from my friends for the rest of my life. I hope Michael Oher got paid for this because you know he is taking shit for it from every opposing Defense he plays against.
Last is did the NCAA really accuse the Tuohy's of adopting Michael Oher with the sole purpose of getting him to go to Ole Miss. Do many family's look for homeless high school or grade school age children in hopes of grooming them to be pro athletes? Seems extemely risky, what if the child has no athletic ability or only gets recruited to a Division II school? Is there a combine that is part of the adoption process? I would like to know what accusations the NCAA made.
All in all this is the perfect movie to go to with your wife or girl friend.
The start of this movie did not go well for me. We got to the theater late and I had to get refreshments while my wife got our seats. I bought a coke, a water and two lage popcorns and wedged them into one of those carrying trays. Suzanne, my wife's name, had gotten seats in the middle of a crowded row. My popcorn was already ready to fall out of the tray so I knew negotiating the row was going to be a daunting task. I started out OK but three women right next to my seat wouldn't stand up and let me pass, they just kind of moved there feet a little. Now to give you some idea of the logistics I am 6'1" 240 lbs and by no means nimble. Well I stepped on the first two women's feet, and I kind of tried to bunny hop the third woman and almost fell forward and dumped the drinks and the popcorn on Suzanne. Luckily I didn't. Sweating and shaken I sat down for the feature.
Another thing you should know, I really didn't want to see the movie, I wanted to see Sherlock Holmes. I usually keep the feel good based on true events movies for home viewing. That way I can comment out loud at the parts I think are made up Hollywood nonsense. But since I get to pick most of the movies we see, I'm a dick sorry, and this had football in it, so we went.
This was a very watchable movie. It told the story of Michael Oher, a man child left on his own by a mother who wasn't able to take care of herself and adopted by a headstrong woman and her family in Memphis, TN. It showed the manchild blossom from an introverted and damaged young man into a student, an athlete and a family member. It was hearfelt without being preachy.
This was Sandra Bullock's best acting job to date, except for the movie where she plays a drug addict that gets sent to rehab. I dont know the name of the movie and I cant find it on her biography, conspiracy? There are no snorts or cutesy moments for her in the movie, she stays with the character the whole movie and does a good job. One thing I would like to see is if she really went to a crack den and threatened to shoot a dealer. Doesn't seem realistic, in my mind that event would end allot different then a crack dealer getting put into his place by a small white woman, but who knows.
The best actor in the movie was the son SJ played by Jae Head, which would be a great name for a rasta band. The kid was great and added heart and made a real connection between Big Mike and the Tuohy family.
There are several parts of the movie that I would love to know if they really happened or were they made up to make the movie more realtable. First is the crack den scene I mentioned before, the second is did the mother ever go and show the coach how to inspire Michael Oher to be more aggressive. I think in real life that would be demeaning to both the caoch and the player, and if my Mom came of the field and helped coach me I would get shit from my friends for the rest of my life. I hope Michael Oher got paid for this because you know he is taking shit for it from every opposing Defense he plays against.
Last is did the NCAA really accuse the Tuohy's of adopting Michael Oher with the sole purpose of getting him to go to Ole Miss. Do many family's look for homeless high school or grade school age children in hopes of grooming them to be pro athletes? Seems extemely risky, what if the child has no athletic ability or only gets recruited to a Division II school? Is there a combine that is part of the adoption process? I would like to know what accusations the NCAA made.
All in all this is the perfect movie to go to with your wife or girl friend.
Friday, January 1, 2010
It Might Get Loud
Movie Documentary about the music summit between Jimmy Page, the Edge and Jack White.
This was a Christmas present from my wife that I had been eagerly awaiting. The movie is about a meeting between three famous guitarists from different generations; Jimmy Page from Zeppelin, the Edge from U2 and Jack White from White Stripes/Racanteurs. The premise is that the three would meet and discuss playing the guitar and their philosophy of music and play together.
If you like any of the three bands you will love the movie. I like all three so I had a hard on for the whole thing. The movie seperated the three and showed you where they came from as artists, their musical tastes and how they got to the point where they are now. I am a big U2 fan but one thing I found interesting was the choice of the Edge as part of the three. Both Jimmy Page and Jack White are blues guitarists where the Edge is a reformed punk guitarist who works hard with Synthesizers to get the most out of his sound. An interesting contrast to me was in one scene the Edge showed how the guitar from one song was nothing more then him playing two string and having it produced so it sounds like its a much bigger sound. The other was Jack White playing live, he was playing so hard that he hands were bleeding all over the guitar. I guess it shows how one gives his blood through precision and perfection to detail and the other literally plays till he bleeds.
I was also amazed by how good Jimmy Page looked and sounded. They filmed a segment in the house where Zeppelin recorded Led Zeppelin 4 and Jimmy told a story about how they needed to have Bonzo playing in the two story living room because how loud he played. You could see on his face that the memory was like yesterday. The movie did a good job of giving you an insight to what playing meant to them and their passion for the purity of the music they want to put out.
They had segments with the men sitting together talking about music and playing part of each others songs. I didnt dig this as much because it didnt seem they had enough time to find common ground to explore. Also when they played together, I believe they were playing In My Time of Dying, where Jack White and Jimmy got to the point where the song opens up and you felt they were about to tear the shit out of the song they stopped playing. I would have loved if they kept going.
Its well worth watching, from a selfish fans point of view I just wanted more.
This was a Christmas present from my wife that I had been eagerly awaiting. The movie is about a meeting between three famous guitarists from different generations; Jimmy Page from Zeppelin, the Edge from U2 and Jack White from White Stripes/Racanteurs. The premise is that the three would meet and discuss playing the guitar and their philosophy of music and play together.
If you like any of the three bands you will love the movie. I like all three so I had a hard on for the whole thing. The movie seperated the three and showed you where they came from as artists, their musical tastes and how they got to the point where they are now. I am a big U2 fan but one thing I found interesting was the choice of the Edge as part of the three. Both Jimmy Page and Jack White are blues guitarists where the Edge is a reformed punk guitarist who works hard with Synthesizers to get the most out of his sound. An interesting contrast to me was in one scene the Edge showed how the guitar from one song was nothing more then him playing two string and having it produced so it sounds like its a much bigger sound. The other was Jack White playing live, he was playing so hard that he hands were bleeding all over the guitar. I guess it shows how one gives his blood through precision and perfection to detail and the other literally plays till he bleeds.
I was also amazed by how good Jimmy Page looked and sounded. They filmed a segment in the house where Zeppelin recorded Led Zeppelin 4 and Jimmy told a story about how they needed to have Bonzo playing in the two story living room because how loud he played. You could see on his face that the memory was like yesterday. The movie did a good job of giving you an insight to what playing meant to them and their passion for the purity of the music they want to put out.
They had segments with the men sitting together talking about music and playing part of each others songs. I didnt dig this as much because it didnt seem they had enough time to find common ground to explore. Also when they played together, I believe they were playing In My Time of Dying, where Jack White and Jimmy got to the point where the song opens up and you felt they were about to tear the shit out of the song they stopped playing. I would have loved if they kept going.
Its well worth watching, from a selfish fans point of view I just wanted more.
Avatar
Starring Sam Worthington, Zoe Saldana, Sigourney Weaver
This is the most visually amazing movie I have ever seen. You need to see the movie in theaters because I can't see it looking this good even on Blue-ray.
It's a great movie and you should go see it but I have issues with the plot. If you don't care about my rambling incomplete thoughts please read no further.
First, is Sam Worthington cornering the market on roles that involve human beings transformed into something else. In just one year he played a man that is transformed into a machine, in the really really bad Terminator and now he play a man who mind melds with an Avatar and becomes jakesully Na'Vi king. My comments really have nothing to do with the movie but it is weird to me that one guy is in two huge movies in the same year with a similar character and a similar plot. A society is under attack by technology and a person who bridges the gap between the worlds must save the society that is being attacked. Also is both movies the leader is martyred, in Terminator it is the annoying Christian Bale and in Avatar its Sigourney Weaver. She of Alien fame, is much better suited for the role. Did James Cameron suggest Sam to the Terminator people? Did he turn down Directing it but say since I directed the first Terminator we can use similar plots and save money on the writing? Its smart, people are going to both movies largely for the visual effects and not the plot.
Second, I have a problem with James Cameron putting the armed forces in the role of the bad guy in destroying Pandora. I have no problem with the thought that man destroys destroys things for its own financial gain. I live in New Jersey and look at refineries lining our rivers and shorelines. I'm sure these were beautiful areas two hundred years ago before oil companies moved in. But to suggest that the armed forces would assist big business and massacre a race of people for an undefined expensive metal is a bit much to me. I guess he's combining what happened to the Native Americans and the oil in the Middle East, but to me it left a bit of a sour taste.
These are my issues and I have many. See the movie you will enjoy it.
This is the most visually amazing movie I have ever seen. You need to see the movie in theaters because I can't see it looking this good even on Blue-ray.
It's a great movie and you should go see it but I have issues with the plot. If you don't care about my rambling incomplete thoughts please read no further.
First, is Sam Worthington cornering the market on roles that involve human beings transformed into something else. In just one year he played a man that is transformed into a machine, in the really really bad Terminator and now he play a man who mind melds with an Avatar and becomes jakesully Na'Vi king. My comments really have nothing to do with the movie but it is weird to me that one guy is in two huge movies in the same year with a similar character and a similar plot. A society is under attack by technology and a person who bridges the gap between the worlds must save the society that is being attacked. Also is both movies the leader is martyred, in Terminator it is the annoying Christian Bale and in Avatar its Sigourney Weaver. She of Alien fame, is much better suited for the role. Did James Cameron suggest Sam to the Terminator people? Did he turn down Directing it but say since I directed the first Terminator we can use similar plots and save money on the writing? Its smart, people are going to both movies largely for the visual effects and not the plot.
Second, I have a problem with James Cameron putting the armed forces in the role of the bad guy in destroying Pandora. I have no problem with the thought that man destroys destroys things for its own financial gain. I live in New Jersey and look at refineries lining our rivers and shorelines. I'm sure these were beautiful areas two hundred years ago before oil companies moved in. But to suggest that the armed forces would assist big business and massacre a race of people for an undefined expensive metal is a bit much to me. I guess he's combining what happened to the Native Americans and the oil in the Middle East, but to me it left a bit of a sour taste.
These are my issues and I have many. See the movie you will enjoy it.
Funny People
Starring Adam Sandler, Seth Rogen, directed by Jude Apatow
Have you ever been at a meeting or a conference and there is a speaker that starts really strong and your really into it, then they go on really long and lose their point and you stop paying attention then they get really uncomfortable and dont know how to end the speach so they say something akward. Thats this movie. This is a good movie gone wrong.
The first part of this movie that tells the story of an aging, angry comic movie star facing his own mortality. To feel alive he goes back to his roots and makes a relationship with a young comedian who helps him feel like a real human being again. This part of the movie is great. I watched the movie thinking that movie reviewers had some kind of vendetta against Adam Sandler. His role in this part of the movie was great as a flawed person dealing with his success and the fact that his best days may be behind him. This is the first movie that Sandler does not hide behind that weird little kid voice he uses in his other dramatic tries, Punch Drunk Love, Spanglish and whatever that bad movie he did with Don Cheadle was called. Seth Rogen does a good job as Ira Weiner, a man haunted by his name , playing the second fiddle/ joke writer/man servant to Sandler's character, George.
Jonah Hill and Jason Schwartzman are great as Rogen's roomates. Schwartzman's character is the star of a sitcom called Yo Teach, which reminds me of those bad 80/90's sitcom where the teacher was strangely involved in the students lives. I would like to see that plot spun off as a sepersate movie.
The movie goes wrong after George and Ira play their triumpant concert in San Francisco. After this the movie spins into a completely new plot involving Jude Apotow's wife Leslie Mann, their two kids and Eric Bana. Look Eric Bana has a great role but this had no place in the movie. Half way thru this part I got bored and worse, it changed how I felt about George. In the first half I felt he was a man trapped by his fame, the second part he is just a rich famous self absorbed jerk. I think Leslie Mann has been great in all of he comedic parts from Big Daddy to Knocked Up, but if Judd Apatow really needed her to have a large role in the movie he could have made a completely seperate movie using hers and Bana's characters and some other wacky plot but not in this movie.
My recommendation to all who want to watch this movie and enjoy it is to do your own editing, watch the movie until the San Francisco concert then turn it off.
Have you ever been at a meeting or a conference and there is a speaker that starts really strong and your really into it, then they go on really long and lose their point and you stop paying attention then they get really uncomfortable and dont know how to end the speach so they say something akward. Thats this movie. This is a good movie gone wrong.
The first part of this movie that tells the story of an aging, angry comic movie star facing his own mortality. To feel alive he goes back to his roots and makes a relationship with a young comedian who helps him feel like a real human being again. This part of the movie is great. I watched the movie thinking that movie reviewers had some kind of vendetta against Adam Sandler. His role in this part of the movie was great as a flawed person dealing with his success and the fact that his best days may be behind him. This is the first movie that Sandler does not hide behind that weird little kid voice he uses in his other dramatic tries, Punch Drunk Love, Spanglish and whatever that bad movie he did with Don Cheadle was called. Seth Rogen does a good job as Ira Weiner, a man haunted by his name , playing the second fiddle/ joke writer/man servant to Sandler's character, George.
Jonah Hill and Jason Schwartzman are great as Rogen's roomates. Schwartzman's character is the star of a sitcom called Yo Teach, which reminds me of those bad 80/90's sitcom where the teacher was strangely involved in the students lives. I would like to see that plot spun off as a sepersate movie.
The movie goes wrong after George and Ira play their triumpant concert in San Francisco. After this the movie spins into a completely new plot involving Jude Apotow's wife Leslie Mann, their two kids and Eric Bana. Look Eric Bana has a great role but this had no place in the movie. Half way thru this part I got bored and worse, it changed how I felt about George. In the first half I felt he was a man trapped by his fame, the second part he is just a rich famous self absorbed jerk. I think Leslie Mann has been great in all of he comedic parts from Big Daddy to Knocked Up, but if Judd Apatow really needed her to have a large role in the movie he could have made a completely seperate movie using hers and Bana's characters and some other wacky plot but not in this movie.
My recommendation to all who want to watch this movie and enjoy it is to do your own editing, watch the movie until the San Francisco concert then turn it off.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)